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Traveling In A Fried Out Kombi

Why can’t weight loss work like crossing the international date line? If I fly west, eventually I’ll lose a day. Poof. Gone. Instant and complete.

And I guarantee you I’ll weigh MORE when we land. The endless feast in business class. Bottomless glasses of booze. They don’t care that we’re up there because we redeemed frequent flyer miles. We’ll still get first class wine.

When we land in Sydney and stagger up to the Rotary greeters at the airport, I’ll be twelve hours lighter with five pounds of fresh flab around the middle.

That’s a fried out kombi.

It’s gotta be.

UPDATE: We are still awaiting our date line crossing. Due to a freak accident at LAX, we are stranded. We may get on a plane in 5 hours or 2 days……..

***********

Enjoy the Noel Coward songbook in the video and the audio version of the exquisite Elaine Stritch singing “Why Do the Wrong People Travel, Travel, Travel?” by clicking the link below:

Elaine Stritch sings Why Do the Wrong People Travel Travel Travel?

49 Comments Post a comment
  1. Don’t I wish that weight loss was like instant karma!

    May 30, 2014
  2. here is a tune to kill some time..

    May 30, 2014
  3. Kir Piccini #

    I love Elaine.. she’s a broad in every good sense of that word.

    Safe,happy travels Andra. (Sip a bit for us..)

    May 30, 2014
    • I fear I sipped a lot last night. How could one not in those circumstances?? 🙂

      May 30, 2014
      • Kir Piccini #

        🙂

        completely acceptable and expected. (Guess that’s why I woke up with a headache?? *wink* )

        safe travels today/tonight!

        May 30, 2014
  4. It does work that way, but you have to walk. 😉

    May 30, 2014
  5. best of luck getting there, and the 5 pounds will be worth it )

    May 30, 2014
  6. Delay? Oooooooo Noooooo! I hope it’s the shortest possible delay. Weight? I’m just about ready to start living on lettuce and other green leafy stuff and pretend the other “stuff” is a figment of my imagination! It’s either that, or surrender! 🙂

    Elaine Stritch is an absolute treasure. Thanks for that treat to accompany my breakfast!

    May 30, 2014
    • I’ve made no secret of how much I adore her. I’m going to sob when she’s finally gone.

      May 30, 2014
  7. Lance #

    I started a workout class exactly 1 month ago today. I’ve gained 3 pounds.

    Be safe and have fun. I’m reading along.

    May 30, 2014
    • I’ll say what everyone says to me……..But muscle weighs more than fat………..(Yeah. I always want to slap them, too.)

      May 30, 2014
  8. Hopefully, those biz class tix will get you some privileges while you wait-showers, or comfy chairs or more free snacks?

    May 30, 2014
  9. Safe travels!!!
    I miss the days of in-flight food. Now on some airlines you have to pay for water!

    May 30, 2014
    • Years ago, I predicted that airlines would become like movie theaters, where one couldn’t bring any outside food or beverages on the plane, and everything would be priced at TILT. I’m glad I wasn’t entirely right………but I was mostly right……

      May 30, 2014
  10. Hope that by the time that you read this comment you’re in the air and enjoying all the food and wine that you want. LAX is always a mess, isn’t it?

    May 30, 2014
    • Never made it into the air, Ally. But that will hopefully happen tomorrow night.

      May 30, 2014
  11. You’re too hard on yourself, Andra. Enjoy first class while it lasts and make sure you get up for a few minutes every hour to avoid deleterious health effects. I know you’ll work off any extra caloric intake with your fabulous world-class walking skills.

    May 30, 2014
    • If we ever get to our final destination, I plan to walk a ton, Rob. 🙂

      May 30, 2014
  12. Part of my job was a commute to Germany every two weeks. Flew first class on American. Loved everything except the weight fight. (resist the goodies? hell no!)

    May 30, 2014
    • Yeah, they do shove food at you the whole time, don’t they? Not complaining. In coach, we have to beg for anything. I used to take gifts for international flight crews. We really got treated well on one flight to Amsterdam: first class wine in coach; first class goody bags; every crew member (even the captain) came out and thanked us. The last time we did that, no one even said thank you. It’s definitely no fun to fly these days.

      May 30, 2014
  13. Stuck at LAX should be a song title or a short story parody of Edgar Allan Poe. Here’s hoping you’re underway and have lost a day.

    May 30, 2014
    • By now you know we’re not, but I’m really excited about what we’re going to do in LA.

      May 30, 2014
  14. tarakianwarrior #

    Sort of like me – when I look at fattening food…my body expands…my clothes do not. *sigh* Sterling just got in last night from London – wonder if you guys passed each other. 😀 Good luck…

    May 30, 2014
    • Stranger things have happened……… 🙂 I saw that he and Olivia were over there.

      May 30, 2014
  15. I hope you get to relax in a fancy Business/First class lounge while you wait! Great photo of you and MTM too. 🙂

    May 30, 2014
    • We got the lounge, though it was NOT fancy. I could really go on a rant here, and I shouldn’t do it, but our infrastructure in this country is appalling compared to other countries. I’ve been in nicer facilities in third world countries than some of ours. It makes me embarrassed that people come here from foreign countries, and their first impression is broken down buildings and often rude security personnel and filthy bathrooms……I sound awful, don’t I? But our airports are one of the most significant gateways into our country, and we make an abominable first impression.

      May 30, 2014
      • I agree on all counts! Our airports suck the fun out of travel and turn it into something to be “endured” not enjoyed. :(. I won’t start on the bathrooms…

        May 30, 2014
      • First sorry about the delay. Second, the truth never makes the teller sound awful. Joe Biden: “If I took you and blindfolded you and took you to LaGuardia Airport in New York, you’d think, ‘I must be in some third-world country,'”
        Our airports, our trains, our roads and bridges…

        May 30, 2014
      • Ahhh the good ole TSA personnel. The Walmart Greeters from hell. Sigh..

        May 30, 2014
  16. Really sorry to hear about the delay, Andra. Hope things are going better for you by the time this comment posts.

    May 30, 2014
    • We’re in the lounge awaiting our Virgin Australia flight, Kate. I hope I’m not misleading anyone (especially myself) by typing that.

      May 31, 2014
  17. So wait. A first class whine about first class wine! And yep, you’re so right about airports here. JFK and Laguardia are embarrassing and don’t get me started on Newark. Granted, JFk keeps getting updates, but they need to do the right thing and allow free wifi, make it CLEAR that it’s not required to take that stupidly expensive airport shuttle train if you don’t want to and a few other things that would leave a better taste in my mouth when I have to drop by any of those hubs…

    May 30, 2014
    • It makes me feel bad to sound like a snob. At least we’re getting to travel, and travel is important.

      May 31, 2014
      • Oh, you DON’T sound like a snob at all! That’s-a my sense of humor making it seem that way (because it’s not truuuuue!). Anyway, having a decent travel hub seems like an afterthought in this country as if they design and redesign these places to be the LEAST efficient and comfortable spots to get to and from. Blech.

        May 31, 2014
      • I can say our current lounge is an improvement. I’m getting ready to take a shower after a long day in prep for the flight.

        May 31, 2014
  18. That sucks, Andra. I hope you’re delay wasn’t too long. I’m just finally getting caught up on reading and social media.

    May 31, 2014
    • Still in LA. On a flight to Sydney tonight. I’m afraid to type that, because we’re hours away from boarding…….I have enjoyed your pictures so much!!

      May 31, 2014
      • Oh brother! I’m so sorry for your delay. 😦 I’m sure it’ll make Sydney/and surrounding so much sweeter when you finally arrive.

        Ed is presently using movie-maker to splice together my stupid video clips into something halfway decent. It’ll be a vlog soon’ish. 🙂

        May 31, 2014
    • I saw that you had movies. I’m really dying to see them. I want to do the rim-to-rim hike sometime, and this will give me a good flavor.

      May 31, 2014
      • I’ll do it with you! It will involve an overnight. Unless you’re up for hiking 12-18 hours non stop. 🙂

        May 31, 2014
      • I’ll do the overnight. I really want to do it. So does MTM.

        June 1, 2014
      • Let’s make it happen then! These wounds will heel soon and I’ll be raring to go!

        June 1, 2014
  19. By now, you have surely landed, Andra, and I’l sure will walk (or sweat, er, perspire) any extra calories off.
    Elaine Stritch is an international institution – and she still has “it”!

    June 1, 2014

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